Picture walking your boy- girl twins to the park on a sunny summer day. A truly exciting and picture perfect scene. But we all know it’s not perfect. Neither is it easy. As a new mother to twins, you may be anxious of what the journey will be like. Well, worry no more, here are 9 things to expect in raising boy girl twins.
Key Takeaways
- Girls may take on a “mini-mommy” role and lead in games and activities.
- Encourage independent growth by providing time apart for boy-girl twins.
- Plan birthday parties that celebrate each twin’s unique interests and preferences.
- Establish a consistent sleep schedule and create a comfortable sleep environment for your twins.
- Address perceptions of favoritism and ensure both twins’ needs are met fairly.
- Prioritize one-on-one time with each twin to nurture individual connections.
- Expect stereotype comments from the public and reinforce the importance of individuality.
- Embrace the twin talk phenomenon while ensuring a strong bond with each child.
- Raising boy-girl twins is a rewarding journey filled with lifelong memories and unbreakable bonds.
1) Your little girl fitting the mommy skirts
It’s common for girls to develop faster than their twin brothers, often taking the lead in games and activities. Your little girl might become a “mini-mommy,” while the boy takes a more passive role. Dr. Pamela Varady, a clinical psychologist, advises parents to recognize this dynamic and teach their twins the importance of each person’s needs and ideas. Encourage them to be unique individuals and avoid reinforcing gender-based roles.
Addressing this phenomenon is crucial in nurturing a healthy sibling relationship and fostering individuality. Check out our guide on dominance and submissiveness between twins to learn more about striking a balance in your twins’ interactions. Furthermore, discussing why comparing twins is not advisable can help you and your children understand the importance of recognizing and celebrating their differences.
To gain a broader perspective on raising boy girl twins, consider consulting resources such as the International Council of Multiple Birth Organizations or joining online parenting communities like Twins & More. These platforms provide invaluable support, advice, and real-life experiences from fellow parents of multiples.
2) Time away from each other
Many parents prefer to keep their twins together, even in school. However, Dr. Joan Friedman recommends separating boy-girl twins to encourage independent growth without the sibling’s shadow. This strategy helps each twin develop their individual personality and reduces the risk of twin separation anxiety.
One key aspect of fostering independence is considering whether or not to keep twins in the same class. While it may be comforting for twins to have each other’s support, separating them can empower them to make new friends, develop unique interests, and build self-reliance.
Encouraging your twins to engage in separate extracurricular activities or hobbies can also be helpful. For instance, one twin may excel in sports, while the other may have a passion for arts or music. By nurturing their individual talents, you can help them cultivate their unique identities.
As parents of twins, it’s essential to strike a balance between providing togetherness and promoting independence. Consider reading our guide on surviving the first year with twins to gain insights into how other parents navigated this journey. Additionally, online communities like Twiniversity offer a wealth of resources, support, and connection to fellow twin parents, providing guidance on raising independent and emotionally healthy twins.
.
3) Birthday Party’s come in two’s
With boy girl twins, you may find yourself planning birthday parties with two distinct themes. While this can be challenging, the joy of celebrating your twins’ milestones makes it worthwhile. You could also opt for gender-neutral birthday themes to make planning a little easier.
To help with your preparations, consider reading our guide on shopping for twins and what you need for your multiples. This guide can provide you with tips and ideas to make your twins’ birthday celebrations even more memorable.
When planning a party, it’s essential to balance each twin’s interests and preferences. Encourage your children to express themselves, and incorporate their personalities into the birthday planning process. This approach ensures that both of your twins feel seen and heard, making their birthday celebration an unforgettable experience.


If you’re struggling to come up with party ideas, consider seeking inspiration from other twin parents. Check out 10 gift ideas for first-time twin moms for suggestions on presents and activities that can make your twins’ birthday extra special. You can also visit Twinmom for more resources, advice, and tips on raising boy girl twins.
Remember, the most important factor of any birthday celebration is LOVE and connection shared by the family. Embrace the double fun and make lasting memories with your twins as they grow older together.
4) Sleep Strategies for Twins
Getting your twins on a consistent sleep schedule is crucial for their development and your sanity. Our definitive guide to sleep training twins can help you navigate nighttime feedings and establish a sleep routine that works for your family.
Creating a comfortable and functional sleep environment is also vital for your twins’ well-being. Explore our tips on creating a twin nursery that doesn’t have to be hard to set up a space that promotes healthy sleep patterns.
In addition to sleep training, consider implementing strategies to help your twins sleep through the night. Our article on 9 strategies for helping your twins sleep through the night offers valuable insights and techniques to ensure a restful night for both you and your babies.
You may also encounter sleep regression in twins, which can disrupt their sleep patterns and make it challenging for parents to cope. To better understand and deal with this phase, check out our resource on sleep regression in twins.
It’s essential to maintain your well-being as you navigate the challenges of raising boy girl twins. Our article on 3 vital insights to prevent parental burnout during the toddler phase provides valuable advice to help you stay resilient and energized throughout your parenting journey.


5) The ‘favorite one’ blame game
Addressing perceptions of favoritism is an important aspect of raising twins. When one child feels you are favoring their sibling, this can lead to hurt feelings and misunderstandings. It’s crucial to treat your twins as individuals and ensure that both of their needs are being met fairly.
Open communication is key in understanding their concerns and interests. Make an effort to spend quality time with each child, addressing their unique needs and preferences. Learn more about strategies in managing preschooler behavior in twins and avoiding the comparison trap with twins to create a balanced environment where both children feel valued and loved. By consistently supporting both twins, you can help dispel any notions of favoritism and foster a strong family bond.
6. Prioritizing Alone Time for Your Boy Girl Twins
Allocating one-on-one time for each of your boy girl twins may seem challenging, especially without help from a caretaker. However, establishing individual connections with your twins is crucial for their emotional well-being and fostering healthy sibling relationships.
Dr. Friedman emphasizes the importance of committing to alone time and working through any protests or anxieties that may arise from both twins and their parents. A strong bond with a parent serves as the foundation for healthy emotional growth and contributes to a harmonious twin relationship.
To create opportunities for individual connection, explore strategies such as managing preschooler behavior in twins and dealing with twin separation anxiety in children. By dedicating time to connect with each twin separately, you can nurture their unique personalities and strengthen your bond with them.
7) Expect stereotype comments from the public
As a parent of boy girl twins, you may encounter unsolicited comments and assumptions from people who haven’t taken the time to understand the nuances of raising twins. Statements like:
- “Do you favor the boy or the girl?”
- “A boy is way easier to raise.”
- “Wait until the girl reaches puberty.”
Such comments can be unsettling, especially when your children are present. However, this is an opportunity to reinforce the importance of individuality and personality in your twins.
To address these challenges, educate yourself on dominance and submissiveness between twins and why comparing twins is not advisable. By focusing on your twins as unique individuals, you can better respond to these stereotypical comments and help your children develop their own sense of identity.
8. Embrace the Twin Talk
Twin talk, also known as idioglossia, is a unique language that toddler twins may develop and use to communicate with each other. This adorable babble-like dialogue can be amusing and expressive, but it’s essential for parents to ensure it doesn’t stem from insufficient parental interaction.
While marveling at their twin talk, make sure to foster a strong bond with each child. Dr. Friedman emphasizes that twin attachment is important, but so is the relationship with their parent. To help establish a healthy balance, explore our article on strategies in managing preschooler behavior in twins.
Enjoy this unique phase of your twins’ development, as they will eventually outgrow their twin talk and transition into more conventional communication.
9) Your Parenting Journey
One of the most rewarding aspects of parenthood is guiding your children to develop their unique personalities while instilling the values you hold dear. Through the years, you can help your boy-girl twins discover their individuality and watch as they grow into admirable adults.
Raising boy girl twins is an exciting journey filled with lifelong memories and unbreakable bonds. While the prospect of getting parenting wrong can be daunting, the endless possibilities of how wonderfully your children can turn out make all the trial and error phases worthwhile. After all, life is a journey of learning and unlearning.
To support you in your parenting journey, explore our resources, such as surviving the first year with twins and our top tips for first-time twin moms. These tools will help you navigate the unique challenges and joys of raising twins.
I have identified seven Amazon products that can be helpful for parents of twins.
Product | Pros | Cons | Customer Feedback |
Baby Trend Sit N Stand Double Stroller | Accommodates two children | Bulky and heavy | Positive: Easy to fold and unfold |
Parent tray with cup holders | Difficult to maneuver in tight spaces | Negative: Hard to turn and fit through doorways | |
Multiple riding positions | |||
HALO BassiNest Twin Sleeper Double Bassinet | 360-degree swivel | Expensive | Positive: Swivels and adjustable height |
Adjustable height | Large footprint may not fit in smaller spaces | Negative: Takes up a lot of space, pricey | |
Mesh sides for visibility and breathability | |||
aden + anais Classic Swaddle Baby Blanket, 4-Pack | Soft and breathable fabric | Expensive compared to other swaddle blankets | Positive: Soft and perfect for swaddling |
Large size | Fabric may wear out after multiple washes | Negative: Wears out quickly after multiple washes | |
Stylish gender-neutral patterns | |||
Twin Z Pillow for Nursing and Bottle Feeding | Designed specifically for twins | Bulky and takes up space | Positive: Game-changer for nursing twins |
Versatile use | Expensive | Negative: Large and takes up space | |
Soft and comfortable material | |||
Gerber Baby 8-Pack Short Sleeve Onesies Bodysuits | Soft, breathable cotton | Sizes may run small | Positive: Great, affordable onesies |
Affordable and practical | May shrink after washing | Negative: Sizes run small, shrink after washing | |
Various sizes and gender-neutral designs | |||
BabyBjorn Baby Carrier Mini | Ergonomic design for newborns | Not suitable for older or heavier babies | Positive: Perfect for carrying newborn twins |
Easy to put on and take off | Limited carrying positions | Negative: Not supportive enough for older twins | |
Soft and comfortable fabric | |||
Skip Hop Duo Double Signature Diaper Bag | Large capacity | Expensive | Positive: Great organization and capacity |
Multiple pockets for organization | May be too large for some users | Negative: Too large and bulky for some users | |
Attaches to a double stroller with ease |
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How do you raise a boy and girl twin?
A: Raising boy and girl twins involves nurturing their individual personalities, fostering their unique interests, and providing equal opportunities for growth and development. Encourage them to explore their passions, teach them to respect each other’s differences, and create a supportive environment that promotes individuality and healthy sibling relationships.
Q: Can you have boy girl twins naturally?
A: Yes, boy-girl twins can occur naturally. They are fraternal twins, which means they develop from two separate fertilized eggs. The chances of having fraternal twins depend on various factors, including genetics and the mother’s age.
Q: What age should you separate boy girl twins?
A: There is no specific age when boy-girl twins should be separated, as it depends on individual circumstances and the twins’ emotional and social development. However, some experts recommend considering separation when they start school to promote individual growth and independence.
Q: What are boy and girl twins called?
A: Boy and girl twins are called fraternal or dizygotic twins. They develop from two separate fertilized eggs and have distinct genetic makeup.
Q: Why are boy girl twins most common?
A: Boy-girl twins are the most common type of fraternal twins, as they represent a roughly equal chance of having either a male or female baby. Fraternal twins occur when a woman releases two eggs during ovulation, and both are fertilized by separate sperm cells.
Q: Is a boy and a girl twin rare?
A: Boy-girl twins are not rare, but they are less common than having two same-gender siblings. Fraternal twins, which include boy-girl twins, make up about two-thirds of all twin pregnancies.
Q: What age do twins get easier?
A: There is no specific age when raising twins becomes easier, as it varies for each family and the unique challenges they face. However, some parents find that their twins become easier to manage as they develop more independence and communication skills, which can happen around the age of 2 or 3.
Q: Are twins difficult to raise?
A: Raising twins can be challenging due to the increased demands on time, energy, and resources. However, with proper support, planning, and understanding of their unique needs, many parents find the experience of raising twins to be rewarding and fulfilling.
Share with us, your journey in the comment section below.